Sorry for your "loose"/ "lose". Condolence Wahala.

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This not exactly a guide but it would give you some pointers to what you can do if you really want to help someone who has lost someone really dear.

7 Cardinal Rules.

1. Please avoid the cliches. They are so empty it just bounces off. Remember that the person is going through a lot of pain at the time. If you have nothing to say that feels right, please keep quiet. Your presence alone is appreciated.

2. Bear in mind that the person had had to tell so many people what happened so please don't ask what happened on the phone unless of course, the person tells you voluntarily. If you are with the person, that should be fine but you should be careful not to worsen the situation.

3. If you have not lost anyone so dear to you, please you cannot understand what it means to lose a loved one. Don't go and tell the person that "God giveth and God taketh". It is very annoying in spite of your good intentions. Rather pray with the person for strength.

 4. If you know you are not going to call the person, don't hassle the person on Facebook or twitter for the number.

 5. No matter the facade the person puts up, know that they are going through a lot of pain and if you know any unhealthy secrets or memories of the person, please leave that to yourself and let the person be left with the fine memories of the person. Don't try too hard to be jovial and draw the person out of his/her sad state, let the person be.

6. Don't tell the person to stop crying, that is just dumb, hold the person and be there for the person if it is appropriate ( I mean if the boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, sister/brother) is around, why would you want to assume that role? Unless perhaps you are very good friends. This part is very tricky so just be sure that your desire to console does not become annoying or cloying.

7. Finally, please please please and please again, grammatical errors in messages of condolences are
are so annoying so please don't go about saying "Sorry for your loose" and "Sorry for your lose" Loose or lose s3n?

Please it is "sorry for your loss".

 Thank you.

Comments

  1. Unknown4 July 2015 at 04:38

    In as much as it sounds funny its very true though. Will bear it in mind so that I also don't shout out "solly for your loose " lol

    ReplyDelete

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